Saturday, December 22, 2012

SFC-WagaSSS: Because You Guys Are Worth Waaaaay More Than This Blog Entry :)

Hi there. I'm a newbie. I was a fresh CLP grad last August. My attendance wasn't perfect but I managed to get 76.92% of the talks complete. I'm not an active participant but I promise I listened and took to heart what all the speakers and sharers said. Hi. My name is Ayn. And for 4 months, I've been a proud SFC-WagaSSS member.

This year has been a tough ride for me, and up to now I don't exactly remember how the Universe conspired on my joining the community. My work is pure harassment. Not literally, of course. I have client meetings every Friday, for which I have to prepare for operational reports every Thursday night. Out of the 7 days in the week, there's just 14.29% chance that the CLP day's gonna fall on a Thursday. But it did. Great. Oh and by the way, a couple of weeks ago, they moved the client meeting to a Thursday instead. Even greater. :)

So it was a struggle for me to make it by 7:30pm then. I'm a humble commuter, by the way, so I have to compute much, much time (and effort) from Commonwealth to Marikina. But it's just how great God can bring things together, and every Thursday night was a miracle. I might have missed three, but still managed to get out of the CLP alive --- and nourished. :) And for months, thus far, I can pretty say things have changed, or rather, the community has helped me a big, big lot to change the way I see things now. Work is more stressful, but I guess it's the perspective with how you influenced me that made all the difference. And by the way, now I understand why our opening prayer usually starts with "Thank You for fixing our schedules." It's always a miracle indeed.

I know I owe God this great blessing of making me part of this community, and I most definitely am grateful to all of you for being His instrument. So to Ate Ecel, Kuya Jerome, Bro Owen, Ate Den-Den, Ate Tina, Kuya Paul, Ate Jelly, Kuya Migs, Ate Patti, Kuya Ronj, Ate Kim, Ate Rizza, Khaye, (Ate) Cheska, Kuya Remus, Kuya Vitus, Em, Emjay, Marjay, Ate Mich, Ate Anj, Ate Ciela, Ate JC, Ate Milan, Aira, Abi, Jojo, Annie, Rose, Lil, Justine, Cookie, Ate Jen, Ate Rose, Dhin-Dhin, Fem, Blue, Regina, Jackie, Ritchell, Harvey, Jay, and to all the WagaSSS Warriors I have yet to meet: thank you for welcoming me and making me part of this incredibly awesome community of believers. And thank you too for the LSS of worship songs that lasts until, uhhh, the next worship.

But as you said (or warned), this is not at all meant to create a perfect life out of us. To be honest, I've dealt with more problems when I joined the community, kamoteh! LOL. But that doesn't at all make me any jaded. I am unfazed. I love it here because I don't have to be any one, or to compete with anybody just to be someone. I have nothing but His grace. I carry nothing but our mission. :)

Someone shared to me that the Church is a hospital of sinners. I agree, and in our own unique ways we continue to seek for healing and change in the different areas of our lives as servants of God and as citizens of this country. Let's welcome healing and change all together as sisters and brothers. Having said that much now, here's to what has been a great year and an even greater and blessed year ahead. :D


OF ASTERISKS AND ALL THOSE SH*T WE USE TO CENSOR FOUL LANGUAGE

With 62 characters, that's the longest title I've ever put in for a blog entry. And 1.61% of those characters most probably caused some eyebrows raised on me when they saw it sandwiched between S, H, and T. --- that one lovely asterisk.

The social network generation was graced with the privilege to be able to express in an unbelievable speed today those thoughts that bother their curious minds, and the feelings entailed with the everyday experiences of their fast-paced lives. Facebook and Twitter are the best (abused) venues. And oh yeah with my weekend FB check I can see no less than a dozen censored status updates full of @, #, $, %, &, *, and all those characters I can display by pressing Shift + any number. Add to them the famous spelling twists just to make the bad words appear less harmful, but a little bit more conyo --- gagee, effin', demmet, wtf, bee-atch, and all other what-have-yous. 

So what about the use of foul language does people make them feel or think they look cool? I couldn't answer either, but I believe it's not the language that mattered in a particular instance when you feel so strongly about something, but the emotion per se. The words just follow, words that might have been an influence from a generation ahead or a simple product of our environment. And because we are aware that what we say or post can actually offend someone one way or the other, we censor those "generally not acceptable words."

Censorship. Ah, the beauty of it all. That other unfathomable side of language, that side most people would not dare get to the abyss of. But there's one thing about censoring your bad words that I don't exactly get. If you rather think it can offend someone, why use foul language in the first place? Sounding cool isn't exactly cool, if how you want to achieve it is by simply copying how other people from other cultures talk. And censoring them isn't cool either --- that's cowardice. If you want to say bad words, stand up to your expressions, freak.

I'm not a clean slate after all, and there are times I'd really, really like to at least write them just to express a bad feeling. But influence is a huge part of our expressions. From the time I joined the SFC community I can say I managed to cut a huge part of bad language, because I simply don't hear it from my sistahs and brothas. Although my frequent use of "freak" has yet to be addressed. Feelings are part of our being human, but how we express them is actually a challenge to prove we are indeed human beings, raised with breed and intellect. 

Influence someone today. If you've heard or seen one censored bad language, just do your part and give them a slap on the face. #


Monday, December 17, 2012

28, YARDLINE!

A month ago, one of my most important life projects just ended with a failure. If you can recall from one of my entries last may titled "Six Months to Live," I told you it was actually my dream to die at age 24. But I successfully stepped through the line, celebrated my 25th birthday with amazing people, and still, I'm alive at this point. Wounded but not dying. Scarred but not dead. Emo, haha.

So since that project has long ceased, I was thinking what next gimmick to pull-off. I honestly still believe it's cool to die young. I'm now 25. So if we do some integral calculations in relation to the inexplicable biological sensation we call 'gut feel', where


I arrived at the conclusion that my new target is... ja-ran! Twenty-eight. Wala lang. Feeling ko lang kasi 29 is too old to die, and within three years I can still die with a Masteral degree if I decide to do it full time. Astig sa derivation di ba? :)

Alright, for people who are taking my words literally, cut the crap. What I'm trying to say is, you really never, never know. So do what you love doing NOW, freaks! Okay, I was talking to myself there. But you get the point. I know I don't have stupid readers. Sooo, let's just talk about this again three years from now, shall we. If I cross the line once more, I'd probably owe you a doctoral degree or a writing stint in NYT the next time. Haha. :D

Sunday, December 16, 2012

LIFE IS A FAIR TRADE


This year has been crazy, and I know a lot of people will definitely agree. From national news to the most personal hullabaloos, I know all of us has had a really tough ride in 2012. So before every blogger posts their year-end thingamajig, I'd like to take a foot forward and say my piece. I won't say much, don't worry.

I'll just bore the heck out of you if I say so much cuentos so let me try to get it pretty straight this time. If you're going to ask me the most important thing I learned this year and say it in 5 words, all I have to tell you is, life is a fair trade, and there are three things why.

1. You have to pay for what you want to get --- They say the best things in life are free. True, but those are for abstract happy feelings you'd never want to miss out on especially when you know you're not getting any younger. But the fact is, hardwork (sometimes) is everything. When I get to hear stories of struggle and pain from people, I never fail to tell them how much I envy their experience. Not for being a masochist, of course, but because these bad moments have become their springboards for success. There's not any instant formula to any achievement. It entails sacrifice. It will always ask from you a good price.

2. You have to negotiate for the best deals --- You can't have the best of both worlds, or, you can't serve two masters. We live in an era when we want to do just about everything our brains can think of, and there are very thin demarcation lines today when we talk about certain aspects of our lives. But the truth is, we have to choose most of the time. Grabbing the opportunity is one, but commitment to your craft is another.

3. No return, no exchange --- When we arrive at a decision, there's simply no room for regret. Impossible sometimes as it may seem, you just have to keep on, keep up, and remember that this path is what you have chosen and you have to stand by it no matter what. Again, no matter what. That's why any decision we must make should have been well thought of, well-discerned, and well prayed for. But know, too, that decision-making is one, but setting your expectations is another.

So you be the judge if life indeed's a fair trade. What do you think? I'd love to hear from you. :D