WILLINGLY WEIRD

by Ayn

People sometimes call me an art snob. Or at least my friend Sharon always does. That's not at all true, if I may contest. I may openly hate the pop culture, but I'm definitely open to all avenues of creativity. It's just that I hate the pop culture. Okay, so maybe she's right.

The word 'weird' was something that has always been dear to me. I may not dress in a strange manner, use odd palettes for my face, or go to joints full of eerie people, but I wanted to be weird by simply NOT doing the things most people do. I never read or watched a single Potter or Twilight. The only movies I watch in theaters each year are Cinemalaya entries. No Bieber, Gaga, Perry, or Rihanna could be found on my playlist. I stopped listening to radio after NU 107 got defunct. Never wanted to get ANY Apple product. Never dreamed of a Ferrari but a vintage little yellow Volkswagen Beetle. Not to mention I stopped blogging when I noticed everyone else was doing it! The nerve. That's why advertisements never worked for me.

But since I have a Facebook account and my Blogspot went live again, sometimes I ask myself whether I'm really not into pop culture, or I'm just too plain indolent to try out some things. I try, but I have to find myself a really, really good reason, or an excusable excuse. And I must admit this laziness can really become a hindrance to human relationships, especially when I feel like I'm pushing people away by telling them indirectly that "We're not the same."

Nevertheless, I know I'm not alone, or maybe I'm just on the other side of the plane. Maybe people who love Gaga thinks everybody loves Kurt Cobain or that Eddie Vedder's vocals are just so ordinary. Or that The Dawn is just a local rip-off of Western New Wave culture, and it's high time Joey Ayala gets a haircut. Well he already did. So now I'm starting to accept that everyone's just finding ways to belong, at the same time express--- and by that I mean owning a certain personality that is ours, and only ours.

I suddenly remembered this acquaintance of mine who most, if not some, consider 'weird.' Perhaps it's just with how she carries and expresses herself. She might wear off-season layers and (not) give you 'the look', but as for me I never saw her as the strange fella everybody thinks she is. In fact I think she's one of the coolest kids I've known, aside from the fact that she also has this knack for creative writing. We were out of town then and people thought she was being emo, staying on the cabana by herself. Didn't tell them I wanted to do that, too (but she was there so I have to strut a different stuff, haha). That was also when we had a first and last real conversation and man, did we never ran out of subject matters. She wasn't trying to be deep, opening up topics like pointillism, realism, and all sorts of -isms, but was rather just being truthful to the craft she can best express herself with.

Maybe that was what I think pop culture has snatched from a lot of us. Everybody loves it, so how now can I see YOUR personality apart from the trends that 85% of the planet follow? I just wished people will think of and own their unique avenues to express their creativity, because believe me or not, we all have artists in all of us. As for me I wish I am able to express myself better instead of coming across as an art snob. As for everybody, I wish we would someday stand up for a cause we love or a craft we enjoy, as beings who would willingly be weird as we are. #