THE SILENT INTROVERT

In the science of psychology, Carl Jung popularized the typology of personality where one can be classified either as an introvert or an extrovert. Introverts are the "withdrawn" types, refusing any form of social interaction during their recharge phase, in contrast with extroverts who regain energy from them. In more recent studies they came up with a third, the "extroverted introverts" otherwise known as ambiverts. Simply put, they are somewhere in between, maintaining a fair but rather selective social circle. 

Getting past an awkward adolescent phase has been one of my biggest struggles. I was not innately social for one. Getting new friends in school was just "part of the job" and if ever I did, I did not exactly maintain them well. It took me a while to understand my behavior. Because most of the kids in my school were either friendly or competitive, I thought I was just weird. Of course, I did not know about Carl Jung and these typologies early on. I did not question myself or hated my sense of non-belongingness though. As long as they leave me be, I get on with my life pretty well. 

As the years went on however, experience forced me to bend a little bit. When I started to work, socializing became literally part of the job. But though it did not hurt to extend social networks, at the end of the day I still retreat to my own room, reading or writing or drawing away from the crowd. Even today. Being an ambivert is confusing for a lot of people. I'd sometimes initiate to do something, be the one to approach first, withstand small talks, but often won't hear from or see me for a whole month (or more) unless necessary. It's not that I hate people. In fact I love people, because listening to their stories opens my world to more possibilities. So although we have the ability to adapt due to our needs or other reasons, indeed, there's a huge part of our being that will never be changed, and that is our nature. 

I know a good number of introverts in my life, and they are all amazing people. Sadly, there are a lot of misconceptions of them being "withdrawn," "anti-social," or "boring" set of people. I admit that even though I am one myself, because I have a higher degree of extroversion, I tend to force them to talk to me even when they are in their recharge phase --- and that's a big No-No!!! A couple of special people in my life are extremely introverted but are highly creative and imaginative in their own crafts. The same way as we have different types of intelligence, we also bring out our best differently through our personalities. I'm sharing this old yet I believe very accurate comic illustration by Schroeder Jones on how to care for your introvert family and friends. It's entertaining, yes, but remember the rules by heart!

So as a tribute to my beloved co-introverts, here's a simple haiku, likening you to beautiful butterflies emerging from out of your cocoons after your recharge phase. Thanks to you, we are reminded that Silence is a vital part of a process, and silence is process itself, both for the waiting and for the awaited. #